Discourse on Sincerity and Aquaintances

So I just returned from a nice weekend in Leuven, a little town about 30 miles from Brussels. I guess its kind of inappropriate to call it little because its actually the capital of Brabant-Wallonie, the Flemish side of Belgium. It was a nice weekend, even though some things 'imprevus' happened.
As I've titled this a discourse on sincerity and acquaintances, I want to make sure you understand that it really is the basis and cause of a lot of things that happened to me this weekend, not just reflections thereupon.
Anyway, it seems that a lot of my time here is spent thinking about relations between people (which i guess is well-spent, considering I'm here to observe the culture primarily), but its so funny because after having turned the thoughts around in my head, I seem to be at the same place I started. To be less ambiguous, what I am trying to explain is that, most of my free time I end up thinking about how people express themselves, whether they know you/don't know you, and how to find out if it is something sincere, and if it really matters. So it was pretty ironic that I had the discussion on the same topic with the man whose home I was a guest in (it was like bringing it to light). I think people with faith would say it really doesn't matter as much as we think it does, basically because people who invest most of their hope in God (or other religious figure/feeling) realize that people are fallible and most of the time very bad at expressing themselves according to their hearts (and that being understood, they focus on the infallibility of Christ as being their comfort). But at the same time, its hard not to let these signals confuse us. For example, I live with a Belgian lady who really gets on my nerves. I have terrible trouble understanding her; I, a Southerner, love to be friendly with people and really consider those with whom I come in contact as opportunities from God to take advantage of. Clearly, I was meant to meet this lady and God has blessed me with her acquaintance She has shown me great kindness in introducing me to her family, her history and culture. I happen to be the only student on this trip with such luck (i'm not saying God has blessed me more, or that I am the only one deserving of this, just meaning to convey how much I realize this is a blessing). And yet, I sometimes wonder if we ever bridge the gap b/w tenants and friends. She's after me continually about money, dishes, etc, and in the most primitive way, as if any moment she expects me to disappear with all my belongings still in her house. It really bothers me because i feel a system of trust should have been developed by now. In fact, the other day I really let her have it. For the first time, I refused to let her criticism (which was invalid) pass me by, and I dished it out. I refuse to let her think I wouldn't stand up for myself. So, even though I know I had the right (and a long time ago, to be frank), I still feel guilty, because it isn't my typical behavior and I don't like to espouse it even in the most appropriate of circumstances. Basically, these are reflections on my confusion concerning -when does one know they are trusted? -when does one know their kindness is accepted? -how sincere are people?
I know these are common questions cross-culturally speaking, and I think they contribute to the irreparable divide more than anything else. It is incredibly difficult to understand Americans for the same reason, because we seem superficial in our congeniality. However, I'll admit that I prefer it. Why be blunt when one can be soft? Why be direct when one can be tactful?
These questions are surely what make life difficult (albeit fascinating) for expats. We are increasingly lonely when we feel that the only relations we make are short-lived and won't amount to anything (for it takes time to breed a relationship). Personally I think that it the cause of my illness this weekend, if not partially a virus from my roommate. I was so sick after yelling at Madame that I really became violently ill. I arrived at her daughter's house, and began to reel I couldn't keep anything down and couldn't stay warm. Why must it be so hard to relate to people, I thought? Half the time I feel as if I'm part of the family, and half the time I feel as if I'm a crook as well as indebted for every bit of kindness shown to me. These people don't want to be nice to me, I think, because it is not their nature to greet people so graciously. I need to leave behind these feelings of inadequacy because they aren't helping me relax and just enjoy what I'm really getting to experience. On top of that, feelings of guilt about not always having fun when I should be because I'm supposed to be having fun since my family is poor and cannot, which had been stirring in me for quite some time, mounted and probably were also a factor in my sickness. To be honest, its hard for me to be here, knowing I'm making the divide between my sister and I even greater. She is a beautiful person, I love her dearly, but I cannot let her jealousy keep me from living my life. Nevertheless, sometimes I can't shake the feelings of sadness derived from this fact, because I know it is me who is propagating the tension. Guess this is what maturity is about. Learning to not let every little thing affect you. Its often very harmful to be too sensitive.
All I can do in order to come to an agreeable conclusion for myself personally, is, decide that I'll behave as I know how, showing kindness and sincerity as I know how, and relax about the rest. People can accept what they will, but I'll do my best to prove wrong that Americans are not 'profond', that we are just friendly on the surface, because surely we are not all like that. And I think its a misconception that contributes to a mentality and precautionary expectation on the behalf of Europeans (in other words, they prepare themselves that we are this way, and prohibit themselves from accessing our existing generosity). Its a catch-22; don't you see?
The reason I find these things so confusing, and often feel ashamed as if it is all just in head, is because as I go day to day and observe the nuances between our western cultures (which theoretically should not differ to much of an extent), I realize we are more alike than we are different, and more so as time passes (and globalisation rears its head). The Simpson's sell as slippers over here, English is the official (and only legal) language of the metro music selection, and Frosted Flakes are increasingly weeding out the plethora of bread and croissant choices. Then, why does it still feel so foreign? Why are we consuming the same things and yet incapable of understanding our fundamental differences? Why do I hate to see these consumables/entertainment figures in common and yet yearn to have no miscommunications?
What I really desire, I think, is that, we retain our cultural distinctions. I want to be in Brussels and do Brussels things (otherwise why go anywhere?). But, I'm perhaps just too sensitive sometimes to stand the difficulties that are part and parcel.
It seems there will always be some differences between cultures and I'm not deploring that idea; I want it. Maybe I'd just rather it be the other way around, more on the superficial and frivolous and less (differences that is) on the profound. That way, we desire to go abroad, have no fear of contact with others, and take pleasure in their trivial pleasures which are different from our own.
As a last note, I very much believe in the power of crossing cultures and what that can do for our world. I think this issue is a matter of breaking down preconceived notions we have been socialized with, that are undoubtedly hazardous to our health (as a collective humanity). What are the effects of your subconscious default programming? The trend is that there is always at least one group currently stigmatized, but its not fair to let this trend continue. If you realize its wrong in one circumstance (the Jewish population, for example), why continue to let it fester in future circumstances (like the present)? EX DUCERE, come out of yourself! Find out what's out there, even if it hurts. I'm speaking to myself too, for I have only just begun.

Oh, and as an addendum, I'm not simply talking about racism, and I'm not talking about wyping your slate clean of all impressions you've had of certain ethnic groups. Perhaps its just a matter of being flexible and open-minded. You may think Borat was a bit extreme, but he was definitely genius and going in the right direction (if nothing else).